Time

Written after my last final of Fall Quarter, where I took CS229, CS144, CS251, Math110, Social Dance

This quarter I learned that the clock keeps ticking. And I’ve further learned to stop fighting it.

I’ve had so many consecutive weeks of simply not knowing how the week would pan out: I had no clue how to allocate my time to accomplish the volume of work I had because most assignments took “indefinite” time. Who knew how long it’d take me to finish a 144 assignment? Depended on how many bugs my C code had. Who knew how long it’d take me to finish a 229 assignment? Sometimes insight fell from the sky. Usually, it didn’t. Stack four, high volume, indefinite-time assignments together and you got my baseline week. Some weeks also had exams.

So, I’d given up on trying to know when I’d be done with X or satisfied with Y. Instead, I went into these weeks knowing that some amount of work would be finished, some amount of work might not be finished, and father time would be faithful and tick away. All I could do at any point in time was to work on the most pressing thing. And after some number of ticks, the work would have to be turned in, and then it would have to evaporate. Perhaps then, ticking time is something to look forward to, rather than something to dread.

And I’m so excited to say that the tick in time that I’ve been anticipating for so long has finally arrived. I went into my last final woefully unprepared but completely calm, as I knew that this moment would come. It has now come, and I’m finally free.

I’m truly thankful to all my friends who have boosted my spirits during this time. And most of all, I’m thankful to God because He is faithful. I’ve been surprised over and over this quarter, as pulling through each week has felt like a miracle. This quarter has taught me so much — yes, academically — but even more importantly about myself, about my friends, and about time itself.

I’m so glad this quarter happened… But I’d never voluntarily do it again.